Why Myles Standish wasn’t fat
In the autumn of 1621, obesity didn’t dine with the 53 Pilgrims who gave culinary thanks for surviving their first disappointing Boston Bruins season. Er, for their first harvest after a brutal New England winter. Why was that first Thanksgiving such a svelte affair, free of the high-BMI epidemic that afflicts so many Bruins faithful nearly 4 centuries later? Was it the free-range turkey? The lean venison? The Wampanoag guests’ demands for a DASH-diet dinner?
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Pilgrim exiles in Plymouth, Mass.
A modern study may help reveal the historical truth: 17th century Plymouth Plantation wasn’t yet bisected by the 21st century Cape Cod traffic snarling the Pilgrims Highway, a.k.a. Massachusetts Route 3.
It was Spanish researchers, not English Puritans, who unbuckled the portly puzzle’s Pilgrim hat. Investigators with the Barcelona Institute for Global Health examined the link between traffic noise exposure and obesity markers among a group of Swiss adults. The verdict? Those exposed to the highest levels of traffic noise ran the greatest risk of becoming obese. Specifically, every 10-decibel rise in road noise packed on another 17% increase in obesity. Seems tractor-trailer downshifts and honking horns may disturb sleep, gridlocking glucose metabolism and diverting everyone to the nearest drive-thru.
Next on the Spaniards’ research to-do list: Can your New England uncle’s annual Turkey Day tales of Red Sox triumphs trigger psychosis among familial Yankees fans?